The Careful Use of Verbal Vinegar
A good deal of any legal practice involves emails — so many emails. It’s a great way to communicate, if the person you’re talking to is operating in good faith. I recently had a frustrating email exchange with someone from the DOE who may not have been above board with what they were telling me.
It was one of the DOE’s dedicated negotiators, and I needed to get across the message that I knew their “final” offers are not, in fact, their best and final offers.
I originally wrote an email saying, “Well, I've known you to be dishonest about what your ‘best and final’ is in the past, because one time we didn't get back to you right away, and you increased your final offer by a couple of hundred dollars. I'd like something on letterhead.”
I hoped, but didn’t expect, that the contact person would reply with a thoughtful answer. Instead, they replied, "Are you rejecting our offer?”
Seemingly a question that had nothing to do with my inquiry. I replied, “No, I want you to make us an offer on letterhead so that I know that at the very least it has the imprimatur of the Department of Education on it. That's a pretty low standard, if you ask me. You probably don’t even need to run it past your supervisor."
Once more, they replied, "Are you rejecting the offer?" Just quoting their previous email.
And I said:
I understand clearly this must be difficult for you and for that I am sorry. This letter might be daunting, but you've probably forgotten you actually wrote one once before. I've CC'd many of the people who helped you write it the first time. I'm sure they would be happy to do so again.
This came about because you were making offers saying they were your best and final, and it turned out not to be true. Given the reputation you've cultivated, I thought you were being dishonest. It turns out you were just badly confused. This is an important step in helping keep things straight. That's why I need the letter on letterhead.
The DOE representative’s deputy director sent a semi-unprofessional, defensive response, as is standard with employees from the city and state. "This individual will not be responding to your incredibly inappropriate email. I've moved all of the people that you CC'd, in an apparent bid to cement your own reputation, to BCC" (which, as far as I know, is pointless).
Sure enough, she came crawling back after two hours. It just goes to show you that when it comes to the DOE, the DOE will teach you the way that it wants to be treated. Polite emails, one after another, get no results — but if you sharpen your elbows judiciously, that can yield dividends. Every single time that the DOE says, "How dare you?” to me, they finally come through after months of ignoring my more polite emails.
For more information about how to sharpen your own elbows, contact us.
Marc Gottlieb
Partner
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Brooklyn Heights, NY, 11201
Marc@GottliebFirm.com
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